Why am I Single?

The infamous question that we often ask ourselves. Even more frustrating when we're asked it by others. We feel as if we're a good catch. We know what we bring to the table. We're educated, employed, possess great qualities and/or can cook a mean lasagna. We have it all figured out but yet we find ourselves alone. And frustrated.

In my latest book, I examined many possible answers to this question. But of course these were just some of countless possibilities. But I think what we must realize more than anything is that it's not as bad as we make it out to be. What we should ask is "why does it bother me that I'm single?" Is it really that bad? Where did this stigma come from? Is it because society shows statistics on where we should be by a certain age because those who were before us were well ahead? Is it because sermons, articles, books, conferences, etc all go out their way to talk about marriage or prepare singles? Why is it hard to find evidence that being single is perfectly normal?

Can I tell you something? Being single is perfectly normal! It doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. It doesn't mean you're damaged goods or unlovable. It doesn't mean that you're unworthy or to be single forever. It just means that you're currently without a partner, and that's OK. What can you do now to believe that? That's the million dollar question.

1 Corinthians 7 is my go-to chapter for those whom are single, engaged, married, or desiring to be married. So to you I'll say this; enjoy being single. Marriage brings about many stresses that single persons need not be concerned with. You are now free to walk in your divine purpose, fulfill your calling, grow close to God, do as you please, travel, cultivate your spirit, and work on yourself. I'm not saying that some of those things can't be done in an actual relationship or marriage. But I'm saying use this time to be fearlessly single NOW.

If marriage is a desire of yours and it's something God has planted in your spirit, then trust that He will make it happen at the right time. If you're still single... SURPRISE! Now's not the right time. It's really that simple. You believe in God, you trust God, you trust in His timing, but for some reason this is the one thing you can't figure out why He won't expedite it. God does things on His own time at the right time.

As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.

The next time you're tempted to ask yourself why you're single, do a switch. Ask yourself why it bothers you that you are single. Then dig deep and realize that you're pretty awesome as you are. Right. This. Second.

Hmmm, is something wrong with me?

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